Terracotta Wonders

Although it is a true spectacle on its own, The Terracotta Army is just one part of what is possibly the world’s greatest mausoleum, built over a 20 sq km area and centred around a 300 metre high burial mound turned into an eternal pleasure palace built to protect and entertain emperor Qin Shi Huang in his eternal afterlife. We were already amazed by how unique each member of the huge army was at the time we visited it, but, having watched a documentary on the army recently, the distinct personality evident in each of the army’s men is truly brought home.

Hear here! The warriors’ unique ears.

Scientific studies using digitised 3D models of all of the warriors show that, so far as can be seen, no two are the same. No two heads, no two faces, even the ears are unique to the warrior. This makes what is already an amazing piece of work into a truly fascinating, almost unique, wonder of the ancient world. A vast undertaking, the scale and variety of which would be difficult to replicate even today. While all of the ancient world’s other wonder builders were focused on scale, ingenuity and distinction were important to Qin Shi Huang. All this and it was built in less than 37 years under the oversight of the greatest leader in Chinese History, the same man who first united China under his own rule and built the original great wall of China. A leader unequalled in his power.

Unfortunately there is a darker side: To making an army as huge as this Emperor Huang needed a workforce capable of inhuman levels of production. He used inhumane methods of motivation, torture and punishment to attain this.  Prisoners and conquered civilians were used as slave labour, working hours on end. Perfection was required and imperfection was met with savage punishment such as maiming, castration and even execution. If a worker failed to attain the high standards required, all of those in his work group would have to either inform on him or be tortured and possibly killed along with him.

The workers who survived this brutal regime were then slain to keep the location and structure of the mausoleum secret from those who may want to disturb Qin Shi Huang’s eternally pleasurable rest.

Phuket, we’re off!

The long and intermittent trip home starts here after a spectacularly relaxing last day in Phuket. To be fair it started last night when we flew to Bangkok, but that’s a technicality. Before we flew to Bangkok we lived it up a little by relaxing with a two hour Thai aromatheraputic oil massage, we detoxed by drinking ginger tea and we retoxed by eating KFC.

Mahlah sits down after our massage

I say we had a big shabang of a Thai massage with oils and aromas etc; I went for the full on Thai massage and Mahlah chose to have a selection of vegetables and creams, possibly salad dressings, laid on her face instead. She still got rubbed with oil but the poor dear didn’t get to enjoy any of the punches or wrestling moves that I received, she just came out glowing like a golden Buddah instead. To be fair, after paying a bit more at a swankier, more professional looking place, I came out relatively unscathed, feeling way better. I felt less like my masseuse had it in for me, except when she took hold of my left ankle and right shoulder and made a surprisingly successful attempt to bring the two together.

I have to say at this point that, although I may joke, Thai massages are a brilliant experience that must be tried by anyone travelling to the land of smiles. They are wonderful and, if you go to the right place, they can diagnose and relieve some pretty serious problems for a relatively cheap price. Just make sure you go to a place where they wear relatively modest, professional looking garments rather than mini-skirts and strappy tops  otherwise you may end up getting more than you bargained for.

Another Thai tradition we got to experience before heading north was weather that makes Britain’s look droll and predictable by comparison. At one point I was getting wet feet and sunburn at the same time.

A flight, a sleep and a dozen or so hours later we are in Bangkok getting ready to pop out to the truly massive Chatuchak Market, which sells everything from full size model animals and waffle shaped eggs to swords and replica weaponry (at least I think they’re replicas). Obviously these few exotic, and even erotic, wonders are joined by a good deal of harem pants, sarongs and tourist tat in which we intend to indulge.

Then there’s the nineteenth of October, our last full day abroad on the trip and then … home!

What do you mean you don’t have it in Orange? Buddhist monks check out golden Buddah statues and accessories.

Chinese Language tips

Hello – Ni Hau “Nee How”

Thank You … very much – Shay Shay … nee

Yes – Hai “Hi”

No / Don’t have any – Mayo

Sorry – Dui bu qi “Dui boo chi”

Tea – Cha

I want that – Wa yow chagga

Too expensive – Thai guilla

I love you – Woaynee

I don’t understand – Wo timbu dong “Woah timber dong”

Meat – Jo

North – Bei “By”

Road – Lu

Street – Jie

Basic Fijian Language Tips

Surviving a stolen passport in China

One sleepless night later and its up early to head to the specialist police station who can help with emergency travel documents, before heading to the Chinese embassy.  En route to the metro station we ask at a local police pop up station if said passport had been handed in, perhaps having been dumped after our money was taken. Sadly not and stress levels heighten as the police hold on to our police incident log report.

“Follow me” one police officer beckons, at which point we’re led to a Chinese police van.

“I hope we’re not been arrested” we both say. Fortunately not, however we got to cruise Beijing cop style in an operations van. It took all we had not to play with the radios. Soon we arrive at the tourist police office.

Excitement levels reduce as we are led to a room to wait whilst they prepare the all important piece of paper which confirms I have reported my passport stolen. Without this I’m unable to get an emergency passport.  We then head to the British Embassy. More hurdles to jump as we have to book a flight to England before we can apply for said emergency passport – which is of course a huge challenge in itself as most airlines will not allow you to book a flight without a passport number. I have 4 days by this point to exit China, and have to also apply for an exit visa which takes 7 working days but I can’t apply for this until I have the emergency passport. In a nutshell I’m drowning in red tape at this point.

Long story short, after hours of searching, we find that we can book via lastminute.com which we’ve had to book, hoping that everything else is ready in time so we can just get the hell out.

Next morning, it seems we have a few more challenges thrown our way for good measure as Jamie’s card (our only working card) is refused for being a Visa Debit and not Visa electron. This is all while rushing to get to the Embassy for 9am. After detouring to try and find a cashpoint we then get lost. I’m literally ready to explode by this point, especially when we receive typical help from a local who gives us directions that lead us to a multistorey car park and two dead ends. Thanks for that mate!

Somehow, almost an hour later then planned we make it. Thank goodness I think, possibly too soon.

My documents are checked. “Hmmm, your flights go via Russia. They might not let you travel with an emergency passport. I’ll go check with a colleague” Says the lady at the embassy. The longest 5 minutes in the history of time then pass until she returns. I try to read her facial expression. Is it good news? I think, and hope and then breath a huge sigh of relief as its fine. I have to return at 11:30 in case there are any questions and by 12:00 I have it. Straight to the Visa office next which is essentially an hour of three separate queues and unorganised organisation techniques but eventually we’re sorted and i can collect my new visa on June 1st.

So rather unexpectedly, we’re coming home long enough for me to apply for a new passport in England, and then get back to Hong Kong to then pick up our existing flights which we’ve asked to be deffered.

We’re both a bit gutted and excited in equal measure. We just have 10 days to get through and are trying to not be too paranoid, but definitely even more cautious. Because in fairness, we’ve both already been really security conscious the whole time we’ve been away. We’ve recently learned that in the last month, 7 guests in our hostel have also had passports stolen. An unfortunate coincidence we hope as I am unable to change hostel until my new visa is issued as the hostels and hotels have strict rules to follow. (Yes thats right, more red tape).

I do just want to finish by taking a bit of time to thank my mum for listening whilst I cry across the internet, helping me report things to my insurance company with the phone in one hand and me on Skype in the other, arranging me an appointment with the passport office on June 5th! so I can make a fast tracked application, and for sticking me on her car insurance for the brief time I’m home as my car has been declared off road all whilst fighting her own personal battles at the minute.

In equal measure thank you Paula and Terry for helping us to find cheap flights to the UK, collecting us from Heathrow and also being really supportive when things seemed  very bleak.

We are both blessed with a loving family and we don’t know what we would do without you.

I also need to thank two colleagues and indeed friends of mine Jane and Di who are helping me out by  countersigning new passport application. I’ll see you on June 4th!

Applying for a Chinese Tourist Visa in Hong Kong

I’ve had sleepless nights wondering about these visa’s. The information online is at best confusing with contradictory instructions and advice on even the embassy’s own website, as well as the various advice sites available. The online accounts from fellow travellers also tell tails of blood, sweat and tears. 

That in mind I had a ream of supporting documents along with two completed application forms downloaded from the embassy website along with answers to the most obscure of questions… 

http://www.fmcoprc.gov.hk/eng/zgqz/bgfwxx/

And it turns out half of this wasn’t needed so I wanted to try and help other born worriers like myself thinking of applying for a visa for China mid travels as it really isn’t as much of a minefield as it’s made out to be at all. 

First of all, most of the advice from fellow travellers on the internet is inaccurate. The process was completely different to that that I’d read (and far simpler) and the horror stories told by those who’d been refused a visa seem either dramatised for artistic licence perhaps, or things were not as straightforward in their circumstances as was being told. In summary take things with a pinch of salt. If you’re circumstances are straight forward, then so will the application process be. 

Finding the Visa centre is easy enough – take the MTR to Wan Chai and take exit A1. 

http://www.mtr.com.hk/en/customer/services/system_map.html

Follow the signs for immigration tower and just before the entry take the staircase on the right. Follow the street/ path to the right and pretty much keep going in that direction. The visa office is signposted and if in doubt ask people and when you arrive you’ll want to go up to floor 3.

At the visa centre, you cannot take a bag inside (fortunately we had heard this already so left bags at our hotel). 

The application form on the Chinese embassy in Hong Kong website is incorrect. But worry not, there are the correct forms at the visa centre itself so I wouldn’t bother printing one, just fill one out when you get there.

The embassy website for China in Hong Kong also says that Chinese visa applications cannot be made if you are not resident in Hong Kong and must be made in your country of residence. We were not however turned away, and were not the only applicants there who were not on homeland so not too sure why this advice is given unless it’s for a more permanent visa type than a tourist visa. Who knows as it’s very unclear advice and doesn’t seem to actually be the case. 
Take one passport photo with you. Doesn’t have to be the square visa photos, just passport sized. There is a photo booth at the embassy but it’s expensive apparently (I didn’t check the price as we didn’t use it).

You’ll need to submit your passport with the Hong Kong entry card as proof of legal stay in Hong Kong. You also have to have a photo copy of your passport to submit so of like is you head over to apply on first arriving in Hong Kong don’t forget to check into your hotel first as they’ll want to see your passports and take he details. 

In addition, you’ll need proof of ongoing travel out of China such as flight confirmation and also proof of a hotel reservation. We only had proof of a one night booking in China  for the first night we intend to arrive but made it clear which destinations we wished to travel in the itinerary section and how long we intend to be in each place. Some people talk of the need to book accommodation for the entire duration and the cancel this after submitting a visa application. We didn’t do this, and nor did we need to so don’t waste your time or money.

Also, some advice says you need proof of how you will fund your trip to China. I took bank statements galore, only to be handed these back and told I didn’t need them. 

Anyway, once you’ve filled in your application form, someone will check it over for you and you’ll be issued a ticket number and you simply sit and wait to be seen. We waited no more then 5 minutes but we went at the end of the day, and there were few others there. I’m told if you go in the morning it’s a different story and you could be waiting 90 minutes or more. This could however be an exaggeration by fee charging agencies who apply for Chinese visas on behalf of tourists. The application and supporting documents and form are then checked again. We had everything needed, and so were given a receipt and told to come back in 4 days time.

You pay for your visa on collection of your passport and visa.  We had a few days planned in Hong Kong so opted for standard service as opposed to express, so it cost us HKD $360 each. Express would have been an additional $300 each and would have meant they were ready the next working day should anyone want one in more of a rush then us.

The last step is paying and picking up your passport and visa. This is very quick. It takes longer to get to the visa office then it does collecting a visa as they are incredibly efficient. You just go to counter 1, hand them your receipt/ collection slip, pay and then go to counter 3 et voila. If your receipt gives a time (either AM or PM  ) for pick up, make sure you adhere to this as apparently the visa office are strict on this. Our collection slip however didn’t give a time, so don’t worry if yours doesn’t either. 

The last step is entirely optional, we celebrated with a Starbucks because WOOHOO! We’re going to China!

We don’t actually know of we will be able to access this blog or any of our means of communications such as Facebook, emails, skype etc. So this could be a bye for now and we’ll tell tales of our adventures when we return to Hong Kong at the start if June. Of course we might be fine in which case more stories to follow soon. 

Lots of love xx 

Staff Sergeant Rhino’s Jungle Drill

By Jamie and Mahlah

We stand transfixed as three rhinos jostle in a pond just a short way from where we stand. Surely after a morning of frogmarching through the jungles of one of the worlds great Buddhist nations is karma, or our just deserts or something. I’m just beginning to wonder if the infamously unpredictable animals are playing, or if it’s about to kick off gangster stylee when a voice booms out.

“Right, come on, let’s get going”

‘Surely not’ I think ‘we booked a safari jungle walk to see animals, not a weekend of military drills’

But it quickly becomes obvious that our head guide, who we call Staff Sergeant Rhino for obvious reasons, has other ideas. He is a man on a mission, a mission to march us to death … and to get stoned off his tits with the help of a spoiled Italian brat who passes the dooby on the left hand side in exchange for having his whiny, silly demands obeyed.

To be fair Sgt. Rhino does what he sets out to do. He said he would show us rhinos and, while most tours are lucky to see a couple, we manage to notch up around fifteen including a full grown male at close quarters which had us running, never mind frog marching, when it put its head down to charge. We weren’t scared though because, for our defence, Sgt. Rhino was armed with the most cutting edge Nepali technology in the form of … a stick. Guns aren’t allowed in the poacher-ridden park so guides get four foot bamboo canes to fend off charging rhinos and attacking tigers with.

Its not about the equipment though its the way you use it and, in answer to a question about the closest he’s been to a tiger he says one attacked him but fortunately, he used his trusty stick to hit it on the nose. I believe this story for two reasons: 1. He says ‘I smacked a tiger on the nose’ in the same way as you or I would say ‘I bumped into Dave on the train. And 2.
He’s quite clearly insane in the style of his fellow Sergeant from Full Metal Jacket, so anything is possible.

But again to give him and Chitwan National Park their due, they promised a variety of exotic animals and they delivered with more than just Rhinos. There were dear aplenty, wild boar strolled across our path on the second day, crocodiles swam in the river and monkeys and macaques leapt through the trees, perhaps disturbed by the rising dope smoke … oh and two hens. None of these proved to be the highlight compared to a massive python preparing to eat a freshly killed baby dear whole. We would have seen more of the spectacle if not for our spoiled Italian comrade romping in like a herd of elephants spoiling Jamie’s picture and whining “I want to get closer”. Result: The snake was scared away from its meal, our guide missed a once in a career sight and the Italian idiot had the tenacity to throw a tantrum and demand to stay. Mahlah was having none of it though as the snake was history and we were on the verge of missing the last boat to our hotel for the night. Even the whiniest of whiners wasn’t going to keep her from on the lure of a shower, meal and bed for the night after a day-long deathmarch.

After scaring off snakes and ignoring the guide the dreadlocked brat told Mahlah “A fearless heart I have”, which she translated as “A brainless twat you are”. Anyway, he’s now gone to have a ‘cultural experience’ in an area with rampant swine flu and no healthcare. Meanwhile us with lesser hearts but a few more braincells are heading onward to Hong Kong, satisfied, rhinoed out and a little tired after our two day military drill … er, jungle safari.

But seriously folks, you can save a lot of money here whether you want a jungle walk, jeep or elephant safari, bearing in mind that the elephants are brutally tortured to make them obey 😦 . The tour operators and travel agents in Thamel will charge around NRP 15,000 (£100) per person for a three night, two day jungle safari in Chitwan including accommodation, whereas we organised the two day safari with a five night stay for less than NRP 10,000 (£70) per person including absolutely everything. Tourist buses costing around NRP 600 (£4) leave Kathmandu from the Thamel end of Kantipath, near the royal palace and basic accommodation costs from just NRP 200 (£1.35) per night. Book whatever safari you want when you get to Saurah on the edge of the park, but shop around and don’t believe everyone pretending to be ‘official’, they’re all private companies employing similar guides so just go for the one that’s right for you.

So hop to it you sorry excuses for tourists and start booking, and if you end up with Staff Sergeant Rhino then get your lazy good-for-nothing backsides in gear!

By Jamie and Mahlah

Saving the rupees and staying money savy in India

A few tips we learned on sataying money savy while we were in India.

1. Barter like you bitch-slap, quick and hard – You’ll get ripped off everywhere if you’re not prepared to barter hard. There are no prices on anything so that shop owners have the opportunity to make as much money as possible on you. It’s your job to make sure that doesn’t happen. As a general rule aim to pay a maximum of half the price they originally ask for it. This doesn’t just apply to shops either, barter for hotel rooms, meals out and even tour guides. it’s all a game at the end of the day and it’s surprising how warm someone you’ve just bartered out of a fiver will be with you.

1b. Know your bartering strategies – Bartering is such a big deal in India, and we westerners are so bad at it (me included) that this art deserves two bullet points. There are a lot of great ways to get the prices you want, perhaps too many to mention, but some of them are simple and effective, like the almost expected ‘I’m walking away’ strategy, where you literally just go to walk away if you don’t get the price you want. When you get the almost inevitable extra price cut, you know you’ve won.

Then there’s the ‘good chump, bad chump’ approach, a little move which works great in couples where one is interested in the product and the other pretends to try and discourage them. We found that our actual inability to agree half the time only added to the effectiveness. Lastly ‘it’s cheaper down the road’ works well in areas with lots of competition. Oh and never get emotional, it’s just business and it can actually be a laugh for all involved.

2. Get a money belt – Despite what the tourist bureau in Mumbai tried to tell us, India is rife with crime, particularly the cities. I was pickpocketed within a week of arriving. Fortunately they got nothing thanks to the fact that most of.my money was strapped around my waist under my clothes. Shorts with button up back pockets also help.

3. Don’t give to beggars – It sounds harsh but you only let the beggars know that you’re a soft target while letting any criminals know where your money is. Also, horrifically, people often disable their children to increase their begging potential, giving to these poor kids will unfortunately encourage the practice so avoid it. There are plenty of development charities to give to if you are inclined.

4. Get a credit card with free international withdrawals – This kind of goes for everywhere but particularly for the likes of India where crime is high and walking around with lots of money is inadvisable. These cards are few and far between but Halifax do a good one.

5. Don’t get ripped off at tourist hot spots by false ticket sellers or tour givers. This happens everywhere.

6. Have a good time and make it a mission to stay savvy in India. This may sound nerdy but it can be quite fun and there’s a sense of accomplishment when you score a good bargain or come in under budget.

7. Ask for the meter whenever you get in a tuc-tuc. If they’ve disabled their meter barter hard to get a good price before you set off remembering there’s always another one not too far away so ‘I’m walking away’ is a good option

Appreciating Sri Lanka thanks to India

By Mahlah and Jamie

Our first few nights in Sri Lanka really have put our stay in India into perspective. Or should I say that our stay in India has really made us appreciate lovely destinations like Sri Lanka? At first glance the two countries and their cultures are very similar, but these first impressions couldn’t be further from the truth.

We have only been in the country for three days and two nights but everyone is relaxed, helpful and genuine. Granted, there are touts trying to sell you things (I would be disappointed if there weren’t) but they are much less pushy and are prepared to pass the time of day with you even when the answer is no. The most entertaining to date being a man who tried first to sell us marijuana and on being unsuccessful went on to try and flog us aloe vera. We have to say the latter came as quite a surprise as we’re quite sure the UK vendors of either product don’t tend to sell both… Needless to say we declined on both counts because god help us if we confuse the two.

As Mahlah already mentioned, everywhere is much cleaner here, even though there is still a lot of poverty. The greatest fright I have had so far was a “rat’s paw” on my foot at our hostel that actually turned out to belong to a cute little pet rabbit owned by the hostel. Shouts of “Oh my god” accompanies. This amused Mahlah no end and I have to say she was very restrained in waiting for me to blog about it. There are lots of mosquitoes, so cue the nets and sprays etc, but apart from that it’s lovely. And actually sleeping under a mozzie net is oddly comforting (thanks to Ann Stamp – woop, woop). It’s  like being in your own personal cloud.

The food is great and relatively safe. Two really cool German guys gave us some brilliant recommendations, Including ‘Big Bite Biriyani’ on Mount Lavinia’s main street, which has the biggest servings of the best freshly bbq’d chicken, grilled garlic naan breads and Biryani rice we’ve ever tasted. After arriving in Hiķkaduwa, we are looking forward to freshly caught and prepared calamari cooked by the family whose house we are currently staying in for a fiver a night. ( Quick tip – travel a little out of town for big savings and empty beaches) The same family have plied us with tea and soft drinks for free as far as we can tell and, in the man’s case, shown us his distinguished collection of medals. It’s all very lovely and a little confusing as their English is poor. Tomorrow Jamie will be taking to the sea on a surfboard for the first time this holiday, more on that soon. Mahlah is contemplating body boarding though may have to settle for a chill out on the beach with the sun, sea and an mp3 player for company. Its a hard life isn’t it?

Beautiful beaches, surfs up tomorrow, viva Sri Lanka!

By Mahlah and Jamie

Tips for eating in India

We’ve suffered the bad side of India’s (in)famous cuisine as well as encountering it’s better side, so we thought we’d write down a few tips for the eager gourmands out there.

Stay away from most meat – Make a special effort to avoid meat in all but the best restaurants, where you’re assured that it’s safe. Trust me, you won’t miss it at all, beautiful dishes such as Mushroom Kadai and Paneer Massala are tasty, satisfying and their like is available all over India

Enjoy the variety – India has the second larget population of any country in the world and its cuisine is supremely varied, from the Mediterranean style fish dishes of Goa to Rajasthan’s mixes of sweet and spicy. Venture beyond the old korma and tikka massala, but bear in mind the other tips.

Don’t drink tap water – It isn’t clean enough for consumption. Bottled water is available everywhere at 20 rupees / 20p per bottle, and of course there are other alternatives 😉

Take street food with more than a pinch of salt – It smells delicious but a lot of it is unhygienic and even that which is safe can push the western digestive system to its limits.

Be careful where you eat – Most of it is common sense, avoid street vendors in grotty puddles surrounded by flies and go for popular restaurants with lots of locals and tourists eating.

Delhi belly? Electrolytes and digestive biscuits are your friend – If you’ve not been careful enough and have landed up with a poorly tummy like we did, electrolyte solutions can be bought for as little as 10 rupees and added to a bottle of water. Alternatively coconut juice is also great, as are digestive biscuits.

Enjoy yourself – if you’re like us you’re on holiday, so as long as you’re careful, there’s a lot of scope for excitement in Indian cuisine.